Eight ways to care for your mental health this holiday season
Words by Kelly Müller.
The holiday season can be a joyous time but it can also trigger difficult emotions, thoughts and behaviours. Unfortunately, the stresses of daily life, exhaustion, grief, loss or loneliness, mental health issues or financial pressures don’t stop because it’s Christmas.
Navigating the complexities of holiday stress calls for a comprehensive approach so we asked psychologist Kobie Allison from Modern Minds to share more around how best to reduce stress and maintain good mental health during this time.
“It’s paramount to first acknowledge that experiencing feelings of being overwhelmed during the festive season is not uncommon,” she says. “This is often due to the augmented social, financial, and emotional demands characteristic of this period.
Adopting a realistic perspective towards oneself and holiday expectations is a crucial strategy. This entails an understanding that striving for perfection in every aspect is neither attainable nor necessary. Embracing simplicity can often yield a more gratifying and less taxing holiday experience,” says Kobie.
Be Ok With Setting Boundaries
“Allow yourself to acknowledge the importance of establishing and maintaining clear boundaries. Engaging in open, honest communication with your family and friends about your needs and limitations is not only healthy but necessary. It's about finding a balance between respecting your own needs and being considerate of others' expectations,” says Kobie.
Avoid Known Triggers
This can be everything from food and alcohol through to certain people or specific topics of discussion. If there’s a particular conversation you’re uncomfortable with, find a distraction or move onto another subject. If you’re feeling overwhelmed in the company of someone, find a relative or loved one you feel comfortable with and go for a walk to get some space.
Set Time Aside For Yourself
It’s important to take time for yourself over the festive season, in fact, Kobie suggests it’s essential! “It's crucial to allocate time for activities that nurture your well-being, such as exercise, reading or mindfulness practices. These activities are not just leisurely pursuits but a vital part of maintaining mental balance during stressful times.”
Try To Keep To A Routine
“It is advantageous to maintain a routine as far as practicable. This includes adhering to consistent sleeping patterns, consuming a balanced diet, and partaking in regular physical exercise, all of which are fundamental to mental health.
Equally imperative is the allocation of time for relaxation and engagement in activities that elicit joy. Whether it be indulging in a book, taking a stroll, or dedicating time to a favoured hobby, these moments of personal respite are essential in providing a counterbalance to the season's frenetic pace,” says Kobie.
Find New Ways To Connect
If you’re isolated, alone or grieving throughout this period, schedule a recurring call or video chat with friends or loved ones on a regular basis. Send out holiday cards and make the most of communicating with friends and family via text, email and social media. Calming activities such as reading, journaling, exercise or meditating can also help you to feel more connected with self.
Kobie suggests: “Engaging in acts of kindness, such as volunteering or donating. Helping others can provide a sense of purpose and fulfilment, which can be especially meaningful during times of personal grief. If your feelings of grief or loneliness become overwhelming, I strongly recommend seeking the assistance of a mental health professional for additional support and guidance.”
Forget About ‘The Joneses’
It’s easier said than done, but trying to keep up with The Joneses over the holiday season will very rarely end well. Set a budget and remember that this time of year is about giving, not spending money. A personal gift – a letter, a poem or a framed photo can be more meaningful than the most expensive one.
“Prudent financial management and curbing excessive expenditure are essential, as monetary strain can significantly exacerbate feelings of melancholy. Formulating and adhering to a budget can mitigate such financial stressors,” says Kobie.
Acknowledge and Process
“The holiday season can indeed accentuate feelings of loss, grief, and loneliness. It's a time when the absence of loved ones and past traditions becomes more pronounced. I would advise allowing yourself the space to acknowledge and process these feelings without self-judgement. This is a crucial step in managing grief.
Reaching out for support can be incredibly beneficial. Whether it's friends, family, or support groups, these connections can offer comfort and understanding. It's also helpful to adapt or even create new holiday traditions that resonate with your current emotional state,” suggests Kobie.
Ask For Help
If you are feeling especially sad, stressed, anxious or depressed, ask for help. Talk to someone you trust or a mental health professional for guidance and support.
“Don’t underestimate the value of seeking external support. Talking to a trusted friend, or therapist, or joining a support group can provide you with additional perspectives and coping strategies. Remember, your well-being should always be a priority, and it's perfectly acceptable to step back and focus on your happiness, especially during the holiday season,” says Kobie.
If you or someone you know needs immediate help, please call 000 in Australia and 111 in New Zealand.
For 24-hour crisis counselling, support groups and suicide prevention services please contact:
AUSTRALIA
Lifeline - Call 13 11 14, Text 0477 13 11 14 (12pm to midnight AEST) or chat online
Kids Helpline - Australia’s only free 24/7 confidential and private counselling service specifically for children and young people aged 5 – 25. Please call 1800 55 1800
MindSpot - a free telephone and online service for people with anxiety, stress, low mood or depression. It is not an emergency or instant response service but provides online assessment and treatment for anxiety and depression. Call 1800 61 44 34
NEW ZEALAND
Lifeline - Call 0800 LIFELINE (0800 54 33 54) or the Suicide Crisis Helpline 0508 TAUTOKO (0508 82 88 65)